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  "I know you don't know me well, but if ever you just need someone to talk to, well..."

  "Like I said earlier, I'm just very tired. When I get tired, I get emotional. I'm fine, really." Josiah kept his eyes focused on her, she supposed for information she wasn’t willing to give him or anyone else for that matter.

  "Well, then I guess I will talk to you another time...hopefully," he said as he reached for the doorknob.

  "Definitely. Sorry you caught me at a bad time. I'm really normally not such a downer."

  "Tess thinks very highly of you, so I'm certain you aren't. But the offer still stands, if you need someone to talk to. It's an open-ended invitation for an open ear."

  Susan said her thanks and once Josiah left, she shut the door and set the deadbolt. She needed to get out of the funk she found herself in. She’d just had an amazingly sexy and apparently caring man in her apartment and here she stood peeking through the crack between her drawn curtains as he opened the driver's door of Madison's car. Yes, her mother was in a hospital bed dying, her father withering away himself, but Susan was alive and well and she needed to feel the vibrancy she felt before. She needed to find some silver lining to cling to and she needed to embrace it without feeling guilty for going on with her life, while her mother barely fought for her own. Susan pulled the curtains tight, double checked the deadbolt, and went in search for the comforts of her bed. Fatigue consumed not only her body, but her mind and her emotions. She felt drained and unable to forgo another moment of sleep, so she slipped beneath the sheets and welcomed with open arms the slumber that awaited her.

  Chapter 12

  The heat of the sand penetrated the hot pink beach blanket Susan shared with Tessa as they watched Cade, Rowan, and Josiah beat their chests like cavemen. Not literally, of course, but by the way they fought for the waves atop their surfboards, they may as well been. Susan actually felt sorry for the young kids out there on the water with the three of them as they snatched wave after wave from the young boys. She didn’t feel bad enough to avert her eyes from the scene, however.

  She watched with amazement as Josiah gracefully mounted his board when a particularly strong wave approached. His long, muscular legs bent as he balanced himself while the ocean mist coated his dark skin and soaked his navy blue board shorts causing them to cling not just to his thighs, but to that spot Susan always found her eyes focusing on. With his arms out to his side, Josiah caught the wave and moved his body with the motion of the water as if he were dancing with the sea. His movements were graceful and precise and even if Susan had wished to, she couldn’t have pulled her attention from him. She brought her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs as she took in the sight of him. He stood startlingly beautiful on the water, like he’d been born for it and the ocean seemed to welcome his company with open arms.

  As he rode out the last wave he caught, white foam chased close behind him, touching the rear of his board as if ushering him to the shore. She watched while he dismounted, keeping hold of his board with one hand then dipping his head under the water. When he emerged, he shook his head from side to side the dark curls of hair flinging a spray of water into the air, the droplets quickly rejoining the water below. Tessa gave Susan a quick nudge against her arm with an elbow as Josiah strolled over in their direction.

  “You’re staring,” Tessa laughed.

  Damn straight she was staring, she thought. Who wouldn’t stare at him? When Josiah got closer, however, Susan averted her eyes and lowered herself to the blanket with the hope that he’d not taken notice to the gawking she’d been doing. She grabbed the magazine she’d brought with her and placed it over her face in a feeble attempt to convince Josiah that she was resting her eyes and taking in the rays, not the sights.

  “You’re not fooling anyone,” Tessa said in a low voice meant for only Susan’s ears.

  Susan hadn’t planned a day at the beach. Hell, the last time she’d stepped in any sand, had been when her and Tessa had worked on the fundraiser over a year ago for the hospital. And that had been all business, well for the most part, but they hadn’t spent any time relaxing or in the water. This morning when Tessa had called her and asked Susan to join them, she gladly accepted. Tessa had said the guys wanted to surf and then barbeque later and Susan knew this would be a great way to set in motion the steps necessary for her to take to get out of the funk she’d been in. After a quick stop to see her father, she’d met them all at Rowan’s then made the trek to the beach.

  The splash of water against her skin and Tessa’s quick reprimand to Josiah had her smiling into the pages of her covering. Josiah’s wet fingers tapped against Susan’s toes and the simple gesture sent heat pooling between her thighs. Now they were both wet, she thought on a sigh at the ridiculous thought.

  “Come in the water with us,” he said, his voice sending more heat coursing through her body.

  Susan tossed the magazine in the sand next to her yellow and red beach bag and jumped to her feet without a word. She would gladly welcome the chill of the water against her skin to chase away the burning in her body Josiah just commanded from her, she was sure without intention. The scorching sand scalded the soles of her bare feet as she rushed away from him. Her desperate need to get off the sand was a combination of getting as far from Josiah as she could and to lessen the pain from the heat against her skin. The beach was particularly congested today so she carefully, but as quickly as possible, weaved through the crowd of bodies sprawled out on towels and chairs in the sand. She didn’t even wait to see if either Tessa or Josiah followed. With each step she took, it seemed as if the water receded and pushed further away from her, not closer. That damn water, she thought, as if it intentionally mocked her. Josiah jogged up next to her with his board tucked under his left arm and kept pace with her easily.

  “Would you like to surf with us awhile?" he asked.

  “No, thank you, I don’t surf,” she told him as her toes touched the shoreline. She sunk her toes into the wet sand in hopes that the coolness would travel from the soles of her feet and spread throughout her body as quickly as the heat hit her. Her bright red painted toenails pressed deeper into the sand until the color was no longer visible.

  “What?” Josiah said with astonishment. “Tessa said you grew up here.”

  “I did, but not everyone who lives near the ocean can surf.”

  Josiah leaned in near to her, his wet body brushing lightly against her skin. “I can teach you, come on,” he said as he grabbed her by the hand and began pulling her into the water. Susan resisted, digging her feet deeper into the moist sand, but it betrayed her just as the water had and gave way so that she had no purchase to fight him with.

  “No, no. My lack of coordination I’ve been hiding so well from the rest of the world would be revealed and although I’m normally up for a good laugh, today is not one of those days,” she said, trying to pull her hand free.

  “Don’t be ridiculous,” Josiah responded as he dragged Susan further into the water.

  They were out waist deep, or rather her waist as he towered over her, before she realized she’d not put up a big enough fight. Damn her body for not listening to her mind, she thought. The chill of the water did little to extinguish the flame rushing through her veins, especially once Josiah placed her in between the edge of his surfboard as it bobbed on the surface of the water and his body. He held on to the board with both hands caging her in his arms, while his bare chest pressed lightly against her naked back. With the exception of the small strips of material from the turquoise bikini she wore, their skin met and although she couldn’t speak for him, caught fire where they touched.

  “The first thing you should do before mounting the board is familiarize yourself with the length and girth of it. Touch is very important," he breathed against her ear while the water lapped against their bodies. The vivid colors of blue and red on the face of his board grew out of focus and the crowd she had noticed earlier blurred. Her complete focus
was on the feel of his breath against her ear, the silkiness of his words fogging her mind, and the needs of her own body that had gone so long without attention.

  Josiah lifted her hands from the water, placing her palms down against the surface of the board while his hands rested lightly on the tops of hers. He slowly guided them from tip to tip, her fingers just skimming the waxy textured surface.

  “Feel the hardness of the board?” he purred. “You never want to mount a flimsy board.”

  Unable to take the sexual innuendos or the desire to place her hands on Josiah, Susan pulled herself free from his hands and pushed the board away from her. She immersed herself as long as she could hold her breath, which wouldn’t have been nearly as long as she needed to compose herself if she’d stayed for days. When she pushed herself to the surface of the water, Josiah sat straddling his board with a smug look on his face.

  “Lesson’s over,” she said while making her way out of the water and heading to the comforts of her beach blanket.

  “But I haven’t properly shown you how you should mount it yet,” he laughed, following close behind her.

  Susan spun on her heels when her toes touched the hem of the blanket and pushed her index finger into his chest. “I’ll have you know a lesson in mounting is the last thing I need. I’m perfectly capable of mounting anything on my own without your aid,” she said without a single thought of what she spoke. Josiah pushed his chest into her finger then had the audacity to lick his lips, tucking his lower lip between his teeth.

  “Your mounting skills are definitely something I would very much like to see at some point,” he said with a cocky grin on his face.

  Susan snatched up her towel and began drying herself off before his words registered in her mind. “Maybe that could happen…hmmm…never,” she said grabbing her bag and stomping her way in the direction of Rowan's house.

  “Smooth move, genius,” Susan heard Tessa say just before she ran up next to Susan.

  Chapter 13

  Josiah handed Rowan a cold beer and the plate of hamburger patties Madison sent him out the back door with, as soon as Rowan finished firing up the grill. There was nothing better after a day of surfing than grilling and drinking as far as Josiah was concerned. Well, with the exception of one particular past time that involved a woman beneath him, but he didn’t see that happening anytime soon, especially after the little stunt he’d pulled with Susan earlier.

  Rowan pressed the cool bottle to his lips and took a quick drink before he spoke. “So, how’d those surfing lessons go today?” he laughed as he slapped the patties on the grill.

  Josiah leaned against the deck railing and let out a groan. “Apparently my sexual aura isn’t as appealing as I once thought.” He shrugged.

  Rowan tossed him a look with a raised eyebrow. “My understanding is that it was more your mouth than your sexual aura.”

  Josiah just huffed and continued drinking. When he’d suggested giving Susan a surfing lesson, he’d had no other intentions but that. Upon entering the water with her and watching the water lap at her golden skin, he’d lost all thought of anything other than getting close to her. Once he felt his flesh next to hers, the head on his shoulders swam away and the head between his legs took over operations and controlled his mouth in such a way that Josiah wished he could negate the moment and start over. In reality, he would like to see Susan’s mounting skills, but if he’d been a wise man he would have kept that to himself until the time seemed fit to bring it up. Today was not that time. She’d looked absolutely stunning standing in the water with him as the bikini she wore flaunted plenty of flesh for him to fantasize about later. So much that he’d not been about to control his urge to touch her or to be near her. The events of the day pulled him away from the conversation with Rowan and he missed the question Rowan had asked, yet still he absently nodded in agreement.

  “Really?” Rowan said swinging his body around to face Josiah. He stared wide-eyed with a beer in one hand and an over-sized spatula in the other. The sight would have made Josiah laugh, except he realized in that moment that he’d given an answer to a question he didn’t know the context of.

  “Wait, what did you just ask?”

  “I asked if you came to a decision about coming into practice with me and Cade.”

  Before Josiah could answer, Susan sauntered out the back door with a stack of plates, napkins, and utensils. He was thankful for the distraction, because he hadn’t actually come to a decision yet. Susan looked absolutely breathtaking. After she’d stomped away from him on the beach, she’d returned to Rowan’s and showered. She replaced the turquoise bikini that had accentuated her assets quite nicely with a teal sundress that stopped just above her knees and contrasted perfectly with her golden skin. Her long blond tresses fell just past her shoulders and still held a bit of moisture from her shower, while she opted out of shoes. The bright red polish coating her toenails drew his attention to her feet and he found that they were just as sexy as the rest of her. He’d always been an ass man, but with Susan he discovered that there wasn’t one part of her that he didn’t enjoy eyeing more than the other. Josiah walked over, placing his beer on the table and relieved her of the load in her arms.

  “I’m sorry,” he said just above a whisper, knowing that she’d know exactly what he’d been sorry for.

  “It’s no biggie,” she responded, shaking her head. She took the napkins and utensils from him, then began setting them out while he followed behind with the plates. She looked over her shoulder with a sexy grin. He wasn’t sure if she meant it to be that way, or if she just naturally looked sexy when she smiled. As the smile reached her eyes, they sparkled and he got caught up in the beauty of them. He wanted to see her smile more often, he decided.

  Cade, Tessa, and Madison followed shortly after Susan, all carrying something to add to the table for their dinner. Madison still hadn’t been feeling like her normal self, which was why she chose to pass up the beach today to rest and join the group for dinner tonight. Rowan encouraged her to take a seat when she went to stand next to him by the grill. He placed a quick kiss to her forehead and watched her closely as she gently lowered herself to one of the chairs. The gentleness with which Rowan handled Madison was as if she were at any moment going to fall apart physically. Josiah watched her for a brief moment, still unsure what brought on her sickness and yet still unwilling to bring it up with Rowan. When the two of them were ready for the rest of the group to know, they’d let it be known.

  Josiah noticed also as he watched Cade place the condiments on the table how he’d not once taken his eyes from Tessa. The regard Cade held for his wife was in complete awe and adoration, something he’d never seen Cade give any woman before. At least not openly as he did now. When Tessa glanced over at Cade, he mouthed a silent I love you and she gave him one in return. Josiah swallowed his laughter when Tessa walked behind Cade and gave his ass a swat after she placed a couple bags of chips in the center of the table. That was so typical Tessa, he thought. Cade, in response, leaned over and placed a lingering kiss on Tessa’s mouth and Josiah turned from the display of affection, more uncomfortable with it than he thought he would be.

  It wasn’t as if he weren’t happy for the two couples. Hell, he was more than glad to see the two people who meant the world to him in relationships that brought them this much happiness. It did, however, make him realize how much he wanted that for himself and how out of place in the moment he felt. He glanced over at Susan and wondered if she were feeling the same awkwardness he was.

  “Susan?” he said, drawing her focus to him. “Could you help me grab a few more beers from the kitchen?”

  “Would you mind grabbing me water?” Madison asked when Susan nodded and the two of them began walking to the door.

  “Not at all,” Josiah said with a gentle touch on her shoulder.

  The evening had been uneventful, laughing at stories from their college days and throwing down a few beers. Josiah shared a few of his own
stories of his time at war, withholding the most gruesome parts as to not bring the party to a screeching halt. Everyone chimed in at one point or another, but Susan had kept silent for the most part, with the exception of a few laughs when Tessa had told of the time she and Susan worked together on a project. Something about a doctor and his pants caught his attention, but Susan brushed it off and changed the subject. The sparkle in her eyes as she laughed had him mesmerized, holding his attention until it faded. When the night ended, of course too soon for Josiah’s liking, he offered to walk Susan out to her car.

  “That was nice,” Josiah said while they descended the steps.

  “It really was. I’m glad Tessa called me.”

  “I am too.” Josiah stood with his thumbs tucked into the front pockets of the shorts he wore while his fingers tapped against the denim. A nervous habit he’d picked up in high school when a beautiful woman stood before him. In the midst of trauma, he was steadfast, but in front of Susan he felt unsure of himself.

  “Well, I should get going,” she said, her statement bringing the movements of his fingers to an end.

  “Can I see you again? I mean, I know Tess invited you over today, but I was hoping you and I could maybe catch a movie, or maybe dinner another night.”

  “Look, Josiah, I like you, I do. You seem like a really nice guy and Tess and the guys love you, obviously, but I just don’t really have a lot of free time in my life right now. I wouldn’t even normally spend this much time at the beach or just hanging out. It really is an anomaly for me, so I’m going to have to decline your invitation.”

  Josiah shrugged it off as if it were no big deal, but truth be told he was a little disappointed. They’d had a good time tonight, and he’d not once put his foot in his mouth or had to apologize for his words. For him, that made the night a success. And from his perspective, Susan seemed to enjoy herself as well, even making more eye contact with him than she had previously. Maybe he read her wrong, but he’d thought he caught her a few times stealing a glance here and there. Josiah shoved it from his mind as best he could and gave her a quick hug. He watched her pull out of the driveway, wishing like hell he’d insisted that they see each other again. He wouldn’t force himself on her, no man who did that deserved to keep his cock attached between his legs in his opinion, but he’d not had his fill of her just yet. Besides, he was willing to bet that she didn’t get out and enjoy herself as much as she should. He hoped to remedy that situation in the near future, if she allowed him.